FFXII Fic.
Apr. 20th, 2007 10:11 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
midnightdiddleFFXII-fic. Written for ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
x_saturnine 'cause she did her homework last night. Sorry it's late!
Larsa-centric. Larsa/Penelo, Larsa/Mistress, Larsa/Archadia, Larsa/World, vague Larsa/Gabranth 'cause I can't say no. Game spoilers, post-game spoilers. Basically, spoilers.
To Ring So Empty, or The Gradual Descent of Larsa Ferrinas Solidor in Ten Easy Steps
x
Larsa sleeps with his first woman at fourteen.
Archadia is teetering on the edge, like it has been for the past half-dozen years. House Solidor has been diminished to one, and the Senate is more or less in shambles. The idea that the Emperor lacks an heir is an idea that weighs heavily on the mind of many, and lightly on the minds of even more.
The woman, for she is a woman, no longer a girl, is several years older than Larsa, and has a round face. Her hair is lighter than his, an almost mottled brown, and her eyes are blue. She calls him "Majesty," and he calls her "Lady," and there aren't many more words.
She is well-to-do, a daughter of one of the more influential Houses. He doesn't pretend that this means anything, because it doesn't, and she doesn't complain. To carry a child of an emperor, even if the child is to be a bastard, is an honor most women would fight tooth and nail to claim, and so she is, if not happy, at least honored.
"Shall I kiss you?" she asks, and she's kneeling on the bed, naked. Her hands rest on her thighs, and her breasts are plump, and Larsa looks no where but her face.
"No, thank you," Larsa says, always so polite, and he is unbuttoning his cuffs. "I don't care to be kissed. I see no enjoyment in it. It is--" He struggles with a button, and with a word. "--wet," he finally concludes, and the button slides free.
It is sex, for that is what the Senate wants. An heir, they say, is needed far more than a virgin emperor, and so an heir they shall have. It is quick, and a little messy, for it is a child who would be a man, and a woman who would be a child, and in the end it means little more than a swelling belly and an appeased nation.
ix
"You were to be my brother's wife, were you not?" Larsa asks at age fifteen. He is sitting in her rooms, watching her embroider. It is a fete, pretending that they are master and mistress, but it is one that Larsa does willingly.
"I was," she says, and the hoop settles over her stomach.
"And do you wish for that still?" Larsa asks, and he watches her needle, flickering in the candlelight.
"I know not, Your Majesty," she says. Her slippered feet peek from heavy skirts as she stands, awkward, and Larsa reaches out, steadies her arm. "I knew little of Your Majesty's brother, and he knew little of me."
"Your age?" Larsa asks, for he has little to give her, save questions, and she has little to give him, save answers.
"I shall be twenty in the autumn." Her fingers are pale, and she pours the tea carefully, lips pursed.
"You," Larsa says, "shall have a palace in the autumn. Shall it be made of ice, or of leaves?"
Her smile is small, near as small as her laugh, and Larsa sits with her in the dark, waiting for the new year.
A child is born in the spring, and it is a son, as all Solidor children are sons. Magiks run long, and some magiks are eternal, and so there shall never be a daughter of the House. Larsa presents the child to the Senate, and gives the child to Archadia, and Archadia, heavy in grief and power, bows to her emperor.
viii
At sixteen, Larsa sleeps with a friend. Penelo has grown, and she is ever the dancer she was as a girl. Bells chime at her ankles, and chains tinkle at her hips, and her hair is the color of the southern wheat.
Larsa gives her his kiss, and his hand, and leads her to a balcony where roses tumble over the marble benches.
"I have nothing," Larsa says, "that is mine to give. I can give you neither child, nor crown. I cannot give you a ring, nor a palace."
Penelo's laughter is lower than the bells upon her feet, and her skin is warm beneath his fingers. "I wouldn't ask for that, even if I knew I could have it, Larsa," she says, and Larsa can't remember the last time he heard his own name.
"Then what," he asks, and he feels desperate, like time is flying from his hands, "would you have of me?"
"A smile," she says, "or a laugh. It's been long," and her silks are dragging amongst the petals, "since I've heard you laugh."
"And how shall I laugh for you?" He catches the chains about her hips, the strands of gold and silver, and he is certain that if he pulled, the chains would tighten and snap.
"In my bed, I think," Penelo says, and her feet chime as she leads him from the rose bushes.
The summer passes quickly, and then Penelo is gone, costumes and jewelry scattered in her wake. Larsa finds himself back in his mistress's rooms, and dark hair is nothing like blonde, but when Larsa closes his eyes, he can't see anything but darkness.
vii
A second son is born in Larsa's seventeenth year. Larsa presents this child, as he did the previous, and then he gives the child to the nurseries. The nurses coo and cluck and coddle, steady women of dull dresses and white aprons. Larsa visits, from time to time, to see his two sons, but he has little time for many things.
Archadia is, as always, growing, and the weight is, as always, heavy on Larsa's shoulders. He watches the seasons pass outside his windows, and he gathers his judges about him, using their hands, and his, to twist the threads of the empire.
It is like a tapestry, woven in black, dyed in red, and at times Larsa wishes he could spread it over the maptable, to see where, and how, and why, so that he might somehow save this Archadia from herself.
A giant, Larsa learns, is quick to die, crumpling inwards upon itself.
Archadia, Larsa learns, is much the same.
vi
"Would you," Larsa asks Gabranth, "die for me?"
"Aye," Gabranth says, and Larsa dips his pen into the inkwell.
"And would Basch," he asks, "die for me?"
The answer is long in coming, and Larsa signs the papers in the silence.
"At eighteen," Larsa says, and Gabranth is ever silent as his side, "I feel tired. I feel that Archadia is ever poisoning me."
"My Lord," Gabranth begins, and Larsa pours sealing wax, purple on the parchment.
"A city in the east has been attacked," Larsa says. "Should you be Gabranth, I would that you take to the east, and with you, as many men as you see fit. If you are Basch, I would that you take to the skies, and with you, as many friends as you might have."
"Which," Larsa asks, and he is near tall enough to look into Gabranth's helm, "shall you be?"
v
Archadia goes to war when Larsa is nineteen. Near all of Ivalice is in an uproar, and destruction threatens every half-step. It is in Archades, surrounded by war-advisors, that Penelo finds him.
“I thought,” she says accusingly, and the paints are smeared upon her arms, “that you would rather have peace.”
Larsa is tired, but he is always tired now, and he can’t stand to Penelo, as he never has been able to. “I had no choice,” he says, turning towards the window. “Archadia has grown weak in the eyes of her enemies. Should I turn a blind eye, the threats shall turn real, and my people will die for it.”
“And so you’ll march to war?” Penelo’s voice is near-broken. “You’ll march off to war-beats, and say that it was best.”
“I am seen as a child, Penelo.” Larsa watches the reflection of Penelo in the window, sunlight blinding out her face. “They will take any advantage seen, and they shall twist it.”
“Then sue for peace. You said it before, that you would sue for peace, and—“
“What shall I sue upon? Decimated cities? Burnt villages? Perhaps the men, slaughtered, or the women, raped? Would you rather I sue for peace upon the children cut from their mothers’ wombs?” It is easy to close out Penelo’s reflection, and easier still to close out her voice. “I will destroy those that would threaten Archadia. I’ve my people, and they shall be protected at all costs.”
Penelo’s hands are cold in his, and he opens his eyes when she rests her face against his. “Then I’ll pray,” Penelo says, lips close to Larsa’s ear, “that you’ll be safe.”
“Take to the far skies,” Larsa says when she kisses his cheek. “In war, not even sky-pirates are untouchable.”
iv
“They call me a god-child,” Larsa says to Gabranth. He is thinner, he knows, and when he looks into a mirror he can see his collarbones, sharp beneath his shirts. His hands look strange, long and brittle, and he curls them before his face. He has become old at twenty, and feels the ages creeping on.
“They say,” Larsa continues, “that I am like a god. I wonder, am I so? And shall I rain down justice and punishment?”
“Perhaps,” Gabranth says, “but even a god must eat, or shall he survive upon breath alone?”
“Breath,” Larsa says, “and moonlight.” He reaches out, and the mist slips between his fingers. “I’ve no appetite for this, Gabranth. I grow tired of these games, and were I a god, perhaps I would devour it all, for lack of wanting.”
“And what would you rather, Lord?”
“I would to Archades.” Larsa curls his fingers, and the mist feels heavy and cold on his skin. “Banners furled and trumpets silenced, I would to my home.”
“Gabranth,” Larsa says, and he can scarce feel his heart, “I am tired.”
iii
Larsa loses his Archadia at age twenty-one.
Penelo touches him, dancer’s fingertips on his skin, and he cannot touch her back, for his world is a mesh of light and sound, and to move would send him crashing through the sheets of glass.
“I,” Larsa says, for he must make things right for Penelo, because he swore himself to her many years before, “am Archadia’s. I cannot,” and there are no words, because Archadia has dragged all his words from him.
“They call you a god,” Penelo says, and her hands are wrapped around his wrists, anchoring him to breath and heartbeats and skin. “When they speak of the Emperor, they speak of a god.”
“And the people grow to hate the gods. Do they hate me yet?” Larsa tugs, and he feels Penelo’s nails catch his skin. He imagines the feel of blood, slipping around his wrists, and wonders if it is real. “Do they fear me yet?”
“They fear for you,” Penelo says, and her mouth is gentle enough that Larsa can near believe her lies, sugar-sweet and poison-soft.
ii
Larsa’s hair is shorn from the fever that wracked his body the year before. His power is shorn from the same fever, and the Senate grows ever more powerful. Larsa is kept within the upper halls of the palace, and his robes scatter the dust upon the floors. He hears, at times, the sharp voices of power, echoing down his empty halls, but he is mostly alone.
His Judges lurk beyond the tapestries, creakings of metal that follow Larsa from room to room, and Larsa takes to talking to them, for there are few others for Larsa to speak to. He watches Archades wake and sleep, wake and sleep, and he sleeps himself, pressed against the windowpanes.
“My Lord,” Gabranth says, “there are those who would see you in power once more. They gather under your name, and they would fight for you.”
“And shall they win?” Larsa asks, and the world looks far smaller than it had when he was a child.
“They would not find defeat an easy taste to bear, My Lord,” Gabranth says. He moves nearer to Larsa, and Larsa turns further towards the window, for the sight of armor no longer sets him at ease.
“I hope, then,” Larsa says as Gabranth removes his helm, steps close enough to breath upon Larsa’s neck, “that they never have to taste it.”
Gabranth’s face is both Basch’s and Noah’s, and Larsa watches it in the reflections the year he turns twenty-two. The time passes slowly, as it does for all those caught in gilt cages, and Larsa wonders if this is what eternity shall always be.
It is not, he decides, an easy task, to be a god.
i
Larsa is killed at twenty-three, during a rebellion led by his followers.
The Senate Chambers are slick with blood, and there are screams ringing in Larsa’s ears. He’s fallen twice yet, and he’s certain he’ll fall once more, but there is little time for such matters, for Archadia is nearly in his hands once again. He swings his blade, feels sweat dampen his shirt, and slips in the blood.
It is a sword that catches him. His mouth opens in an ‘o,’ but he cannot speak, for there’s a peculiar little something caught in his throat. It doesn’t hurt as much as he’s sure it should, and so he lets fall his own blade, reaching for his stomach, and the sword that is cutting him through. It is then he falls again, knees buckling beneath him.
The floor is warm beneath him, soaking through his clothes, and there are cold gauntlets wrapping about his waist.
Gabranth’s voice is raspy in his ear.
“My Lord,” Gabranth says, and Larsa has never liked the Judge’s helms, not when he was a child, and not now, when he wants to look at Gabranth, see whether Gabranth is wearing Noah’s face, or Basch’s. “My Lord--”
“My sons?” Larsa asks, for suddenly it all seems terribly important, maybe more so than Archadia, even though Archadia should be everything, for Archadia always was everything.
“Safe, My Lord,” Gabranth’s voice says, and his metaled fingers are pressing against Larsa’s fingers and Larsa’s stomach, covered in Larsa’s blood. “Taken by sky-pirates to Rozarria.”
“Ah,” Larsa says, and there is another thing stuck in his throat, and when he coughs it clear it is red, bitter on his tongue. Larsa wonders if this is the taste Gabranth spoke of, of defeat. “Penelo, then, and--”
He’s not quite sure what he’s speaking of, nor whom he’s speaking to, and there is a weight growing on his chest, weighing him down. He catches Gabranth’s fingers, holds them tight, and he’s not quite sure how to breathe, for everything simple is no longer so simple.
“Gabranth?” he asks, for he’s scared, and this Gabranth isn’t the Gabranth of old. That Gabranth left him, for most everyone’s left him, and Larsa hates the way the screams in the palace ring so empty.
“I’m here, My Lord,” Gabranth’s helm says, and the screams seem a little quieter, a little further away. Larsa’s fingers can’t hold onto Gabranth’s, and Gabranth’s horns shift in Larsa’s eyes, growing and twisting. Larsa can’t bear to watch, and so he closes his eyes, tries to catch a breath.
“I’ve lost her,” Larsa says, but Archadia isn’t his to lose, never has been, because Archadia has always been more than Larsa could ever hold onto, god or not. “I’ve lost,” and in the end the loss rings empty in Larsa’s soul.
Larsa never was a happy boy.
If bits and pieces of this read eerily similar to To Fall From the Sky, that's 'cause I was writing this before I wrote To Fall From the Sky, and I tend to get ideas stuck on the brain. So, uh... Yeah. Things might be similar. Just view this as a spiritual predecessor? *fails so hard*
x_saturnine 'cause she did her homework last night. Sorry it's late!Larsa-centric. Larsa/Penelo, Larsa/Mistress, Larsa/Archadia, Larsa/World, vague Larsa/Gabranth 'cause I can't say no. Game spoilers, post-game spoilers. Basically, spoilers.
To Ring So Empty, or The Gradual Descent of Larsa Ferrinas Solidor in Ten Easy Steps
x
Larsa sleeps with his first woman at fourteen.
Archadia is teetering on the edge, like it has been for the past half-dozen years. House Solidor has been diminished to one, and the Senate is more or less in shambles. The idea that the Emperor lacks an heir is an idea that weighs heavily on the mind of many, and lightly on the minds of even more.
The woman, for she is a woman, no longer a girl, is several years older than Larsa, and has a round face. Her hair is lighter than his, an almost mottled brown, and her eyes are blue. She calls him "Majesty," and he calls her "Lady," and there aren't many more words.
She is well-to-do, a daughter of one of the more influential Houses. He doesn't pretend that this means anything, because it doesn't, and she doesn't complain. To carry a child of an emperor, even if the child is to be a bastard, is an honor most women would fight tooth and nail to claim, and so she is, if not happy, at least honored.
"Shall I kiss you?" she asks, and she's kneeling on the bed, naked. Her hands rest on her thighs, and her breasts are plump, and Larsa looks no where but her face.
"No, thank you," Larsa says, always so polite, and he is unbuttoning his cuffs. "I don't care to be kissed. I see no enjoyment in it. It is--" He struggles with a button, and with a word. "--wet," he finally concludes, and the button slides free.
It is sex, for that is what the Senate wants. An heir, they say, is needed far more than a virgin emperor, and so an heir they shall have. It is quick, and a little messy, for it is a child who would be a man, and a woman who would be a child, and in the end it means little more than a swelling belly and an appeased nation.
ix
"You were to be my brother's wife, were you not?" Larsa asks at age fifteen. He is sitting in her rooms, watching her embroider. It is a fete, pretending that they are master and mistress, but it is one that Larsa does willingly.
"I was," she says, and the hoop settles over her stomach.
"And do you wish for that still?" Larsa asks, and he watches her needle, flickering in the candlelight.
"I know not, Your Majesty," she says. Her slippered feet peek from heavy skirts as she stands, awkward, and Larsa reaches out, steadies her arm. "I knew little of Your Majesty's brother, and he knew little of me."
"Your age?" Larsa asks, for he has little to give her, save questions, and she has little to give him, save answers.
"I shall be twenty in the autumn." Her fingers are pale, and she pours the tea carefully, lips pursed.
"You," Larsa says, "shall have a palace in the autumn. Shall it be made of ice, or of leaves?"
Her smile is small, near as small as her laugh, and Larsa sits with her in the dark, waiting for the new year.
A child is born in the spring, and it is a son, as all Solidor children are sons. Magiks run long, and some magiks are eternal, and so there shall never be a daughter of the House. Larsa presents the child to the Senate, and gives the child to Archadia, and Archadia, heavy in grief and power, bows to her emperor.
viii
At sixteen, Larsa sleeps with a friend. Penelo has grown, and she is ever the dancer she was as a girl. Bells chime at her ankles, and chains tinkle at her hips, and her hair is the color of the southern wheat.
Larsa gives her his kiss, and his hand, and leads her to a balcony where roses tumble over the marble benches.
"I have nothing," Larsa says, "that is mine to give. I can give you neither child, nor crown. I cannot give you a ring, nor a palace."
Penelo's laughter is lower than the bells upon her feet, and her skin is warm beneath his fingers. "I wouldn't ask for that, even if I knew I could have it, Larsa," she says, and Larsa can't remember the last time he heard his own name.
"Then what," he asks, and he feels desperate, like time is flying from his hands, "would you have of me?"
"A smile," she says, "or a laugh. It's been long," and her silks are dragging amongst the petals, "since I've heard you laugh."
"And how shall I laugh for you?" He catches the chains about her hips, the strands of gold and silver, and he is certain that if he pulled, the chains would tighten and snap.
"In my bed, I think," Penelo says, and her feet chime as she leads him from the rose bushes.
The summer passes quickly, and then Penelo is gone, costumes and jewelry scattered in her wake. Larsa finds himself back in his mistress's rooms, and dark hair is nothing like blonde, but when Larsa closes his eyes, he can't see anything but darkness.
vii
A second son is born in Larsa's seventeenth year. Larsa presents this child, as he did the previous, and then he gives the child to the nurseries. The nurses coo and cluck and coddle, steady women of dull dresses and white aprons. Larsa visits, from time to time, to see his two sons, but he has little time for many things.
Archadia is, as always, growing, and the weight is, as always, heavy on Larsa's shoulders. He watches the seasons pass outside his windows, and he gathers his judges about him, using their hands, and his, to twist the threads of the empire.
It is like a tapestry, woven in black, dyed in red, and at times Larsa wishes he could spread it over the maptable, to see where, and how, and why, so that he might somehow save this Archadia from herself.
A giant, Larsa learns, is quick to die, crumpling inwards upon itself.
Archadia, Larsa learns, is much the same.
vi
"Would you," Larsa asks Gabranth, "die for me?"
"Aye," Gabranth says, and Larsa dips his pen into the inkwell.
"And would Basch," he asks, "die for me?"
The answer is long in coming, and Larsa signs the papers in the silence.
"At eighteen," Larsa says, and Gabranth is ever silent as his side, "I feel tired. I feel that Archadia is ever poisoning me."
"My Lord," Gabranth begins, and Larsa pours sealing wax, purple on the parchment.
"A city in the east has been attacked," Larsa says. "Should you be Gabranth, I would that you take to the east, and with you, as many men as you see fit. If you are Basch, I would that you take to the skies, and with you, as many friends as you might have."
"Which," Larsa asks, and he is near tall enough to look into Gabranth's helm, "shall you be?"
v
Archadia goes to war when Larsa is nineteen. Near all of Ivalice is in an uproar, and destruction threatens every half-step. It is in Archades, surrounded by war-advisors, that Penelo finds him.
“I thought,” she says accusingly, and the paints are smeared upon her arms, “that you would rather have peace.”
Larsa is tired, but he is always tired now, and he can’t stand to Penelo, as he never has been able to. “I had no choice,” he says, turning towards the window. “Archadia has grown weak in the eyes of her enemies. Should I turn a blind eye, the threats shall turn real, and my people will die for it.”
“And so you’ll march to war?” Penelo’s voice is near-broken. “You’ll march off to war-beats, and say that it was best.”
“I am seen as a child, Penelo.” Larsa watches the reflection of Penelo in the window, sunlight blinding out her face. “They will take any advantage seen, and they shall twist it.”
“Then sue for peace. You said it before, that you would sue for peace, and—“
“What shall I sue upon? Decimated cities? Burnt villages? Perhaps the men, slaughtered, or the women, raped? Would you rather I sue for peace upon the children cut from their mothers’ wombs?” It is easy to close out Penelo’s reflection, and easier still to close out her voice. “I will destroy those that would threaten Archadia. I’ve my people, and they shall be protected at all costs.”
Penelo’s hands are cold in his, and he opens his eyes when she rests her face against his. “Then I’ll pray,” Penelo says, lips close to Larsa’s ear, “that you’ll be safe.”
“Take to the far skies,” Larsa says when she kisses his cheek. “In war, not even sky-pirates are untouchable.”
iv
“They call me a god-child,” Larsa says to Gabranth. He is thinner, he knows, and when he looks into a mirror he can see his collarbones, sharp beneath his shirts. His hands look strange, long and brittle, and he curls them before his face. He has become old at twenty, and feels the ages creeping on.
“They say,” Larsa continues, “that I am like a god. I wonder, am I so? And shall I rain down justice and punishment?”
“Perhaps,” Gabranth says, “but even a god must eat, or shall he survive upon breath alone?”
“Breath,” Larsa says, “and moonlight.” He reaches out, and the mist slips between his fingers. “I’ve no appetite for this, Gabranth. I grow tired of these games, and were I a god, perhaps I would devour it all, for lack of wanting.”
“And what would you rather, Lord?”
“I would to Archades.” Larsa curls his fingers, and the mist feels heavy and cold on his skin. “Banners furled and trumpets silenced, I would to my home.”
“Gabranth,” Larsa says, and he can scarce feel his heart, “I am tired.”
iii
Larsa loses his Archadia at age twenty-one.
Penelo touches him, dancer’s fingertips on his skin, and he cannot touch her back, for his world is a mesh of light and sound, and to move would send him crashing through the sheets of glass.
“I,” Larsa says, for he must make things right for Penelo, because he swore himself to her many years before, “am Archadia’s. I cannot,” and there are no words, because Archadia has dragged all his words from him.
“They call you a god,” Penelo says, and her hands are wrapped around his wrists, anchoring him to breath and heartbeats and skin. “When they speak of the Emperor, they speak of a god.”
“And the people grow to hate the gods. Do they hate me yet?” Larsa tugs, and he feels Penelo’s nails catch his skin. He imagines the feel of blood, slipping around his wrists, and wonders if it is real. “Do they fear me yet?”
“They fear for you,” Penelo says, and her mouth is gentle enough that Larsa can near believe her lies, sugar-sweet and poison-soft.
ii
Larsa’s hair is shorn from the fever that wracked his body the year before. His power is shorn from the same fever, and the Senate grows ever more powerful. Larsa is kept within the upper halls of the palace, and his robes scatter the dust upon the floors. He hears, at times, the sharp voices of power, echoing down his empty halls, but he is mostly alone.
His Judges lurk beyond the tapestries, creakings of metal that follow Larsa from room to room, and Larsa takes to talking to them, for there are few others for Larsa to speak to. He watches Archades wake and sleep, wake and sleep, and he sleeps himself, pressed against the windowpanes.
“My Lord,” Gabranth says, “there are those who would see you in power once more. They gather under your name, and they would fight for you.”
“And shall they win?” Larsa asks, and the world looks far smaller than it had when he was a child.
“They would not find defeat an easy taste to bear, My Lord,” Gabranth says. He moves nearer to Larsa, and Larsa turns further towards the window, for the sight of armor no longer sets him at ease.
“I hope, then,” Larsa says as Gabranth removes his helm, steps close enough to breath upon Larsa’s neck, “that they never have to taste it.”
Gabranth’s face is both Basch’s and Noah’s, and Larsa watches it in the reflections the year he turns twenty-two. The time passes slowly, as it does for all those caught in gilt cages, and Larsa wonders if this is what eternity shall always be.
It is not, he decides, an easy task, to be a god.
i
Larsa is killed at twenty-three, during a rebellion led by his followers.
The Senate Chambers are slick with blood, and there are screams ringing in Larsa’s ears. He’s fallen twice yet, and he’s certain he’ll fall once more, but there is little time for such matters, for Archadia is nearly in his hands once again. He swings his blade, feels sweat dampen his shirt, and slips in the blood.
It is a sword that catches him. His mouth opens in an ‘o,’ but he cannot speak, for there’s a peculiar little something caught in his throat. It doesn’t hurt as much as he’s sure it should, and so he lets fall his own blade, reaching for his stomach, and the sword that is cutting him through. It is then he falls again, knees buckling beneath him.
The floor is warm beneath him, soaking through his clothes, and there are cold gauntlets wrapping about his waist.
Gabranth’s voice is raspy in his ear.
“My Lord,” Gabranth says, and Larsa has never liked the Judge’s helms, not when he was a child, and not now, when he wants to look at Gabranth, see whether Gabranth is wearing Noah’s face, or Basch’s. “My Lord--”
“My sons?” Larsa asks, for suddenly it all seems terribly important, maybe more so than Archadia, even though Archadia should be everything, for Archadia always was everything.
“Safe, My Lord,” Gabranth’s voice says, and his metaled fingers are pressing against Larsa’s fingers and Larsa’s stomach, covered in Larsa’s blood. “Taken by sky-pirates to Rozarria.”
“Ah,” Larsa says, and there is another thing stuck in his throat, and when he coughs it clear it is red, bitter on his tongue. Larsa wonders if this is the taste Gabranth spoke of, of defeat. “Penelo, then, and--”
He’s not quite sure what he’s speaking of, nor whom he’s speaking to, and there is a weight growing on his chest, weighing him down. He catches Gabranth’s fingers, holds them tight, and he’s not quite sure how to breathe, for everything simple is no longer so simple.
“Gabranth?” he asks, for he’s scared, and this Gabranth isn’t the Gabranth of old. That Gabranth left him, for most everyone’s left him, and Larsa hates the way the screams in the palace ring so empty.
“I’m here, My Lord,” Gabranth’s helm says, and the screams seem a little quieter, a little further away. Larsa’s fingers can’t hold onto Gabranth’s, and Gabranth’s horns shift in Larsa’s eyes, growing and twisting. Larsa can’t bear to watch, and so he closes his eyes, tries to catch a breath.
“I’ve lost her,” Larsa says, but Archadia isn’t his to lose, never has been, because Archadia has always been more than Larsa could ever hold onto, god or not. “I’ve lost,” and in the end the loss rings empty in Larsa’s soul.
Larsa never was a happy boy.
If bits and pieces of this read eerily similar to To Fall From the Sky, that's 'cause I was writing this before I wrote To Fall From the Sky, and I tend to get ideas stuck on the brain. So, uh... Yeah. Things might be similar. Just view this as a spiritual predecessor? *fails so hard*
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Date: 2007-04-21 06:29 am (UTC)(And also, writing confusing sentences seems to be up there. ::pokes at first::)
And poor Larsa-- he belongs so much to Archadia that it's a wonder if he can ever salvage anything out of the masses of responsibility he's been handed for himself. If anything, both Penelo and Basch will probably end up being key to it-- but as you show, that doesn't mean they'll suceed. ;_; And I cannot WAIT till you (if you!) put this up the ffxii_fic comm. I must go recc this to my comms and fic-list!
Heh, and here I thought I was the one growing addicted to your fic. ;) Hopefully it'll be ready in the next week or so... I keep writing bits and pieces of it and then rewriting it as I keep reading more and more of your work. It's practically a homage to your ideas on Larsa, I think. ;)
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Date: 2007-04-21 06:44 am (UTC)I will definately post this to
And don't hurry on the fic, but I'm totally excited! *squees* it'll be like an early birthday present, yay!
Speaking of Larsa, what were/are your thoughts on Gramis?
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Date: 2007-04-21 06:56 am (UTC)And yay, happy early birthday! Incidentally, when shall that day come anyway? And how old will you be turning? ;)
As for Gramis... hmm, I have to admit, that man remains an incredible mystery to me. I've just started replaying the game (yay for powerleveling making dungeons a breeze XD) and I'm just up to the cut-scenes now where Gramis meets with the Senate to discuss Vayne's failure and Larsa's ascendence. And it strikes me so much that, for all that Gramis is the emperor, he seems curiously powerless in many ways.
He can't keep the Senate from bringing Vayne from justice-- like he says, when it comes to deciding between Archadia and his own son, he has to pick Archadia. He can't keep the Senate from manipulating Larsa with information on Vayne's wrong-doing-- though it seems that he dislikes their attempts to pull the strings on Larsa, he can't keep them from doing that either. And hell, judging from the way everyone keeps blaming VAYNE and not him for such events as the Nethicite stealings and the invasion/destruction of Nabradia, he doesn't even have enough power to keep Vayne from doing as he wills in the government. Gramis seems all but a figurehead to me by the end of his years-- and by the time of his death, of course, that status seems to be complete.
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Date: 2007-04-21 07:14 am (UTC)And thank you! It's on May 4, and I'll be twenty-one! I feel so old. D:
Hmm... See, I was hoping you'd have some to shed, because I played most of FFXII while I was in various stages of sick, so I remember very little of anything, other than the pretty pretty ending. I really should replay it, preferably in English, but in time!
But I like your comment on the Solidors and the Senate, because Vayne obviously sees the Senate as a threat, both to him as a ruler, and as a threat against Larsa. I wonder if the emperor really was a figurehead, like England's monarchy? The monarch is a figurehead to the country, but all the real power is in the Senate/Parliment. And, uh, that's as far as my knowledge of goverment and politics goes.
One thing I read today, while checking Larsa's middle name, was that Larsa was the favorite son of Gramis, and I wonder, was he? Certainly Gramis was fond of him, but a lot of the game, from the very small bits I remember, I was never quite sure who Gramis was speaking of, because he always said, "I have to choose my country or my son, yada yada, EMO." And every time he said son, I just tossed in Larsa ('cause Larsa's cuter than Vayne, whut?). But it made me wonder, what would Gramis have been like, as a father? I mean, other than coughing and saying vaguely cryptic things concerning his sons, we never saw much of Gramis. But Larsa was particularly shocked and, dare I say it, broken, when he learned of Gramis's death. So Gramis must've been a better father than, er, I always write him. D:
Though I always got the feeling that in the end, Gramis picked his sons over his empire (and his own life). If he saw Vayne as a threat to Archadia, he could've had Vayne killed, because he certainly had his other two sons killed. And I always took the last conversation between Gramis and Vayne as a sort of pact that they'd do whatever they had to, to protect Larsa. Or rather, that Vayne would do whatever he had to, to protect Larsa, and that Gramis gave him his blessing.
Then again, for some reason, I got the feeling that Gramis was practically saying, "okay, kill me now. :D" Possibly fever-induced thoughts. Man, I really need to play through the game again.
And when is your birthday? :D
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Date: 2007-04-21 07:23 am (UTC)Mine is on December 20th. I'm turning 23 this year. And please don't say you're old-- you're making me feel like a fossil. XD
Hmmm... I honestly don't think that the Emperor is mean to be just a figurehead in Archades, considering how much power the emperor's son, Vayne, seems to have. After all, after Vayne disposed of his father, he seemed to gain absolute power over the entire empire and its army with apparent ease. I doubt that would be the case if House Solidor didn't already have a history of much influence. I tend to favor the interpretation that it is Gramis and possibly his impending illness that is slowly but surely shifting the balance of power over from House Solidor to the Senate-- which might just be why Vayne is so eager to get rid of the "dead weight" of his father. O.O
And really, it's sad to seee how little we do get to see of Larsa and his interactions with his family-- both real and 'adopted'-- in the game. Gramis says Larsa greatly looks up to his brother-- but in most of Larsa's interactions with Vayne, he just seems frightened and/or rebellious. We never get to see Larsa and Drace interact or even see Larsa's reaction to her death. Considering the fact that she was supposed to be Larsa's principal guardian and the one who more or less taught him everything, it must have had a profound affect on him.
You're right-- we never get to see Gramis and Larsa interact, though I tend to think that Gramis probably did treat Larsa tenderly, if only because Larsa was so young, so endearing and probably such a contrast to the power-hungry, homicidal meglomaniac Vayne was. Larsa doesn't strike me as the sort of person who's hard to love, after all. ;) And I agree with you on Gramis' last words. Throughout the series, he seemed to be a man practically on the verge of death anyway and certainly someone who was wracked with regrets over what he had done as an emperor. (The way his fists balled up when the Senate mentioned his two dead sons-- ouch.) Maybe he all but voluntarily gave up the ghost in hopes that Larsa would be able to right all the wrongs that he did after all. Who knows, honestly?
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Date: 2007-04-21 07:35 am (UTC)I would've loved to see Larsa's interactions with anyone from Archadia. I mean, we never even saw him with Gabranth, unless you count holding a dying man's hand as interaction. D: One of the scenes I always wish we got to see was the one where Larsa leaves Bur-Omisace (sp?) with Gabranth. One, because he left to protect the Kiltias, and two, because the way Al-Cid speaks of it, it almost sounded as though Larsa really didn't want to go, but Gabranth talked him into it. And I wonder if, maybe, Gabranth said something about Drace, and that's how he got Larsa to come along.
Oh, I wish!
I have to say, though, Gramis always struck me as a very gentle character. I wonder if part of it had to do with time. He was older, yes, and he was ill, but I wonder if he always calmed down with age, and realized that power wasn't everything. A lesson Vayne really could've benefited from, urk.
And when I stop to think about it... I just wish we could've seen Larsa in Archadia more than once. Since, you know, it's his country, and all. Poor Larsa, so short-shrifted in the game.
And you're so old. >.> Kidding, kidding! Though sometimes I really am surprised with how old I've gotten. I feel like I'm still a kid, or I think, "I was in high school only a few months ago," then I realize it's been years. Time goes so quickly, but it goes so slowly, all at the same time. XD
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Date: 2007-04-21 07:46 am (UTC)And oh Larsa! What short shift he-- and nearly every character whose name doesn't rhyme with Gash!-- got.
Though cruelest of all was what little we get to learn of Penelo. ::sob::Seriously, would it have killed the game developers to try and show off more character details? I know the game was meant to be all about Grand Destinies and Fighting the Gods and Intricate Politics but... but... I don't care about any of that if I don't get to care about the characters either.And yes, Gramis really did strike me as a much more mellow dude than ol' crazy Vayne could ever grow into. I actually felt very sorry for him by the end of his death, although I'm sure he probably had more than a hand in turning Vayne into who he became eventually. But the look on poor Larsa's face when his father died is just... heart-breaking. I suppose it was Penelo, compassionate as ever, who ended up letting him cry into her shoulders after that. ♥
Hey, you are so on the verge of getting the birthday fic yanked if you keep up talk like that. ;P But yeah, I know what you mean-- except for me, it's college that feels that way. I graduated almost a year ago! God, that feels like yesterday. X_X
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Date: 2007-04-21 07:57 am (UTC)But I must say, the part of the game that had me headdesking the most was the end, when Team Vaan was like, "yay, we beat the Undying! Yay, we're free from the Occuria." You know, like, ten minutes after Vayne said, "omg why don't you understand, I just want us to be free from the Occuria!" *headdesk*
All in all, the game didn't strike many chords in me. No real character love, except for Larsa and our various Gabranths (yes, even the punk ass bitch <3). And Vayne. And Gramis. Basically, House Solidor, plus Judges. But I did like the idea of parallelism that was running through the game.
The Occuria were controlling the humes because the humes were stupid and did dumb things like kill themselves. Archadia was controlling Dalmasca because the Dalmcascans were (arguably) stupid and did dumb things like kill themselves (and their kings). And yes, both powers created the circumstances that allowed them to claim control. And in the end, both victims fought back and got their freedom, but at what price?
And then the parallelism between the characters! Oh, it made my lit heart squeal.
And speaking of characters, what about that Fran/Penelo? XDAnd no worries! We're both still spring chickens. It just happens to be summer. Possibly fall. >.> But we're still spring chickens! It's just the moments when I think, "John Keats had already written some of his most famous poems by this age, he died not five years from now" that I start feeling old. And it's not so much that I'm feeling old, that I feel as though I have nothing to show for my life. D: Oh, dear, late nights lead to waxing (an emo) poetic.
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Date: 2007-04-21 08:04 am (UTC)(Even the PAB Gabranth?! ::gasp, quelle horror::)
Seriously though, I ended up loving most of the characters by the end of the game. Larsa and Penelo most definitely-- but also Basch, Ashe, Vayne, Drace, Migelo... I'm not sure how it happened but I love them so, even despite how little I know of them. Or hell-- maybe it's partically because they remain such interesting mysteries to me. XD
And parallelism rocks. ♥ Team Ashe and Team Bad Hair were playing for the same goal all this time! It's just that Team Ashe involved less genocide reaching it so that they won! XD
Hey now, for every John Keats, there's a Jorge Luis Borges (♥!) that didn't even write his best works until he reached middle age. We still have a lot of life and creativity left in us, y'know. ;)
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Date: 2007-04-21 08:17 am (UTC)(Especially PAB Gabranth! He made me cry at the end! Oh, Gabranth!)
If I must be honest, I hated the game. Well... I played the entire game chanting, over and over, how much I hated it. I played the entire game thinking how I would complain on my lj about it. I played the entire game with this feeling of utmost dread, 'cause that game? I hate it. I hate it so bad.
But oh, I love it, too. *cries* It's like a bad relationship you know you should get out of. I shouldn't go back to it, but I always do, because Larsa! And Gabranth! And Larsa and Gabranth, *winkwinknudgenudge*.
The rest of the characters... Well, I really liked Basch, and Penelo, and Fran. Baltheir rocked my socks. Ashe was okay, as long as she wasn't breathing, and Vaan...well, Vaan was really stupid, but he was kinda cute, minus the dirty abs. But the thing that made the characters hardest for me to love? Their voices.
Yes, I'm shallow. But I'm not a big fan of voice acting in video games. It always makes me feel a little ashamed, dirty, if you will. Like... I more or less refused to play that game in company, because dude. The characters. And their voices. Mostly being Ashe breathing, but still. Better than FFX, yes (ohgodTidus), but-- But-- I'm allowed to be shallow.
And as a game, it was harder to fall in love with, since it was all the Great and Terrible Quest, rather than the Great and Emotastic Hero. But now I'm just being nit-picky. And yeah, there are probably five hundred things I could nit-pick about FFXII, at the drop of a hat. But. But. If I ignore the little things that made me chant "hatehatehate" under my breath, there were good things, too.
Like Larsa. And Gabranth. Together. The music was superb. The fully-rendered cutscenes were flawless. The costuming-- Oh, the costuming was beyond beautiful (though the vierra village did make me feel a little awkward with polite company about). The landscaping, the layouts, even the battle system, were all awesome. And did I mention the music? 'cause the music was beautiful like whoa.
Also, Ondore was really hot for an old guy. Also, cane? OMG. SO MUCH LOVE. *has a horrible fetish for men with canes*
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Date: 2007-04-22 03:15 pm (UTC)Talk about bringing sexy back! ::drools::
But darling, though you know my love for you is vast, I cannot stand behind Larsa being paired with the PAB. In fact, the only PAB ship I really like is PAB/Vossler (when they're having severely kinky sex with each other!) and PAB/Drace (because she's awesome and could totally take his bitch ass. And because their death scene made me feel actually sorry for the two!) Basically, whenever the PAB is paired with someone who can beat the heck out of him whenever he deserves it. Larsa would be much too nice to do that much! ;)
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Date: 2007-04-22 05:24 pm (UTC)But, one comment? Where is his scar? Or, gasp, could this be Noah? Or, greater gasp, could this be Noah, returned from the dead? Or, greatest gasp, could this be Noah, back to escort Larsa to their hall-of-the-really-hot-dead? :D
And alas, I should make myself far more clear! Though, yes, I do have very few morals, and, uh, I might write questionable *cough* fics, I see Larsa and Noah!Gabranth in an entirely lord/thane light. Like, like-- I'm sure I've used this example before, but I'll use it again! Like Zelda and Link. Nothing remotely sexual, or even romantic, between them, but there's a bond that can't be broken. Link would die for Zelda, and for Zelda's wish, because he's her thane. He'll do anything for her, and yes, there has to be a kind of love in that, but it's not a romantic love, because a romantic love simply isn't strong enough for that. And dude, class issues, whut. And that's like Larsa and Noah!Gabranth, with a little parental love tossed in.
Noah!Gabranth would (and did) die for Larsa, and would be quite happy doing so, because it's Larsa, and Larsa is his lord. And Larsa would have to let him do it, because Noah!Gabranth is Larsa's thane, and that, more or less, is the only reason for Noah!Gabranth's existing. To bring about Larsa's wishes. And in return, Larsa's to give Noah!Gabranth honor, a place to drink his mead, and all that great stuff. BUT. BUT. The point is, the point is-- Other than me getting off on Beowulf, the point is-- I might've forgotten it, actually.
Oh yes! Because, dude, their love is the gen love. Like, those gen fics you're forever searching for, but just can't find. The ones where two characters love each other so much, and it's just love, nothing else. And it's like, they exist because of each other? A lord and his knight, yes? Also, tragic. Nghk. Because even if Noah!Gabranth hadn't died on Bahamut, he would've died eventually, and more likely than not, he would've died for Larsa. And he would always die for Larsa, 'cause he was, more or less, existing for Larsa.
Kinda like Basch and Ashe (who I personally don't see, 'cause I think Basch is too stuck on HONOR and the WORLD and possibly PEACE, with a side of PENELO). OH WAIT. Like Basch and Rasler, for those three minutes before Rasler bit the dust. LIKE THAT. Only more tragic. YES. MORE TRAGIC.
D:
As for smexing? I prefer Noah!Gabranth with himself. Er. That sounded weird. Hmm... I do like the completely screwed up relationships where Noah!Gabranth is using Basch's face, like a nice bit of Noah!Gabranth/Vossler, where Vossler doesn't realize that, ya'know, he's smexing someone up, and he might think it's all a dream, and isn't it nice, Basch is alive, and he didn't betray Dalmasca? And then the alarm clock goes off, and he's trying to figure out why he's all tired and sore, 'cause it was just a dream? Yup. Or, or, Noah!Gabranth and Vayne. 'cause can you just imagine the everything in that? O:
or Judge/Judge. 'cause every Judge should be with every Judge. Speaking of which, have you ever seen a Zar-- Zarga-- The-only-Judge-to-survive-the-game fic?
And, er, I'll shush up now, and stop my mini dissertation on everything. O:
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Date: 2007-04-23 05:31 am (UTC)And Luc Court (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/300408/) writes some DAMN GOOD Judge fic over at the Pit o' Voles. He made me fall in love with Zargabaath (the only Judge that lived!), honestly and sincerely. I really reccomend Love is Not Four Letters, The Art of Drowning and The Marriage Blade by him... though really, all his fics are brilliants! He's another author I live in constant envy of. ;)
Also,
And Larsa:Noah :: Rasser:Basch is another mathematical equation I can get behind entirely. (Poor dumb Rassler and poor woe-begotten Basch-- they need more love! Must... not... start writing fic... about them!)
Oh baby, NEVER shut up. It's one of your many charms here! ♥